From: marleenk@icubed.com
Date: 1/19/00
Time: 2:36:00 PM
Remote Name: 208.157.21.113
I am a foster/adoptive parent of a 6 year old boy (Patrick). When he was placed with us @ age 2; we were told he was FAE. Patrick was born in a correctional facility; birth-mom had been incarcerated for the last 3 months of her pregnancy (used cocaine and alcohol previously). Patrick has none of the physical features of FAS/FAE. No abnormalities have been noted by Patrick's pediatrician since placement.
He make tremendous progress immediately; "flunked" out of developmental intervention services after 4 months (was noted as highly unusual progress rate). He began speaking in whole words within a month of placement as well. (was delayed in speech, fine and large motor skills)
Patrick is considered by all who meet him (to include teachers and psychologists) as "advanced" and above average in intelligence. I agree, but do not considered him "gifted" at this time. My background is in social work, early childhood development, and teaching. Patrick and I have enjoyed fun "mommy school" activities since he was two on a consistent basis. He has always been very motivated to learn, and considered "mommy school" fun. It is possible that his knowledge base and high verbal skills are simply due to the amount of "exposure", as compared to his peer group. (basic reading skills at age 3yrs.)
Patrick had no/or minor behavior or academic problems in Preschool or Kindergarten. Since October of this school year (1st grade), Patrick has been very inappropriate in the classroom: constant talking out and talking with other students, not following classroom routines, disruptive in group work, and on a few occasions – left the classroom. This then escalated (aprox. a month later) to stealing and lying consistently. Shortly after, Patrick began pushing or hitting other children.
No changes had occurred in our immediate family. No trauma inducing event occurred to Patrick, to my knowledge.
These behaviors were repeatedly consequenced upon our knowledge of them. Communication from the school tends to be slow and still remains partially forthcoming until we have "meetings" (3 so far, usually 8 or more weeks apart). Behavior Modification techniques were employed in the classroom [i.e. smiley stickers per/time segment of appropriate behavior]. The teacher has since modified Patrick's access to lunch money, markers, others' possessions. Stealing repeats itself when a substitute is responsible for the classroom. The teacher communicates with us via a notebook daily: i.e., O.K. day; or good day; or bad day, Patrick stole from "name". Most communication is very brief.
Yet another meeting took place at the school yesterday. Everyone (guidance counselor, teacher, principle, and myself) agreed that no significant long-term progress had been made, with the exception of a decline in his stealing. Other behaviors escalated when the stealing declined. Patrick also had a short two-week period with marked improvement before Christmas.
At this meeting, the principle stated that he suspects these are "attention getting" behaviors. He also commented that Patrick "enjoyed" his visits to him and the office; and had particular interest in all the activity and observations. The teacher stated that she has tried to allow Patrick to participate in "enrichments" since he shows above average knowledge in much of the class content. However, Patrick can't be trusted in the hall alone (will go exploring), so "enrichment" opportunities stopped. He continues to be disruptive during "rug" and "group" activity. She noted, the quality of his work is without error; when he does it.
During the meeting I interjected an observation I made while visiting the classroom. Patrick was exuberantly blamed for taking a girls marker. "I" had to point out that Patrick wasn't in the room. During another occasion, my husband was volunteering on the playground during a recess period. He witnessed a boy punch Patrick to get his ball. Patrick punched back and was consequenced following a brief discussion between Patrick, the other boy, and recess aid. The interchange could not be heard, but the other boy was not consequenced. I interjected this then, and now, because I suspect a portion of "Patrick" behaviors, may indeed belong to others; or he is not verbalizing in his own defense. The teacher responded by stating that she frequently reminds the class not to always blame Patrick. (?s – thought provoking comment)
This meeting closed with a plan to evaluate Patrick for ADD/ADHD. Another (4th) meeting is planned for March 7th. I personally and professionally doubt he has either ADD or ADHD due to his behavior at home and other social environments. I do believe he is thinking-all-the-time and enjoys seeking out new activities or knowledge (limited TV watching but much inside and outside play). He can work on a tasks and follow a conversation for considerable lengths of time. His self control/regulation appear age appropriate (potentially above age level). Note: our home environment is structured and routine; he does have trouble with the transition when this changes on occasion (appears scatter-brained).
My quandary is the vast difference in behavior in and out of the classroom. Other than his current 1st grade problem behavior, he is an affectionate, highly engaging, compliant, inquisitive boy. He can exhibit age appropriate organization and attention at home, shopping, extended family's homes, cub scouts, church, family trips. [I have never received a problematic report from his friend's mothers, but plan to call them anyway.]
Another mom and a MD have both suggested that his unusual school behavior is connected to his "giftedness." [both of my adopted children are voluntarily participating in a research study which includes an MRI. The researcher is the MD I referred to above. Patrick was also able to hold still for 45 minutes while the MRI took place. The researcher commented on this as an above average ability for a 6 yr. old]
I hope I have provided you with enough information to provide me with some of your thoughts. I really am at a loss, so is the school.
I am very concerned about recent changes in Patrick, i.e. lower self esteem, much more emotional sensitivity than usual, not as excited about going to school (has asked to stay home on occasion – or go back to Kindergarten) He took a credit card from my purse during Thanksgiving break. It was his first time stealing out of school and the first time in my purse. He hasn't stolen at home since then, but he has begun lying semi-frequently at home (mostly in regard to how his school day was).
Please feel free to contact me regarding any additional questions or comments you may have. Thank you, Marleen Marleenk@icubed.com
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